This is how the solemnization for a Muslim-Malay marriage in Singapore goes
- Exchanging of marriage gifts (Hantaran) between representatives of the bride and groom before the solemnization, if any.
- A sermon (Khutbah) on marriage by the Kadi / Naib Kadi (solemnizer).
- The bride’s Wali appoints the Kadi / Naib Kadi to solemnize the marriage or otherwise agrees to solemnize the marriage himself.
- Solemnization (Akad’ Nikah).
- Taklik, reading of special marriage conditions by the groom.
- Prayers by the Kadi / Naib Kadi (Dua’).
- Groom giving the bride the Mahar (Maskahwin).
- Collection of the marriage certificate.
What items are needed
- NRICs of the groom, the bride and her Wali
- NRICs of the two witnesses
- Appointment Letter
- Mahar (Maskahwin)
What is a Hantaran (Marriage Expenses)?
A Hantaran is a customary gift, usually in cash, given by the groom to his bride’s family for the Walimah (wedding banquet).
The Hantaran rate must be agreed upon by both parties.
What is Wali?
In Islam, a Wali is a person who is responsible for the bride’s life before she is married.
As a Wali, it is also his duty to ensure that the proposed groom is a reliable and a trustworthy person who will continue to carry on his role and responsibility towards the bride after her marriage.
Who is a Wali?
Listed in the proper hierarchy, a Wali can be the bride’s birth father, her paternal grandfather, brother, paternal uncle or any male relative from her paternal side. If there is none available, then the Kadi will assume the role as a Wali.
What is the role of the Wali?
The Wali must consent to the marriage. The Wali must accompany the bride when she makes her registration at the Registry.
The role that a Wali plays in your marriage is of great importance. Hence, a Wali, who is found not to be lawful for the solemnization may render a marriage null and void. The consequence of an annulment is undesirable from both the Syariah and civil point of view. For one, the legality of the child that will be borne from the intended marriage that the couple is undergoing is dubious and this will have a bearing on future inheritance matters.
In any event the Wali’s consent is falsely declared, the Registry has the right to reject this marriage application and all bookings made in lieu to this application will be cancelled.
The groom must utter those words in one breath and must be clearly heard by at least two of the main witnesses sitting beside the kadi.
The kadi will then ask both witnesses and others whether the groom’s vows or recital can be accepted.
If they agree, then the marriage is solemnized and the wedded ones are now deemed husband and wife.
But then there are occasions when the Akad Nikah has to be taken again.
Why is that so?
Well, if the witnesses are not satisfied with the vows made by the groom, for example, his voice cannot be heard clearly, or he stutters or miss a word, or it is not done in one breath, so to speak, then the process of solemnization must be repeated.
Sometimes if the groom fails a few times, the imam will give him a break so that he could calm down and settle himself properly before the akad nikah is taken again.
This usually happens when the groom is really nervous and he forgets the words of acceptance, especially when there are many people around and he is not used to being the center of attention.
Sometimes too, the witnesses are just too fussy and not easily satisfied, and sometimes just want the vows to be taken again to test the seriousness of the groom on his marriage.
But, these cases where vows have to be taken many times are few and seldom.
Normally the vows are accepted after one recital by the groom or at the most, three times.
Signing of the documents
After the akad nikah is accepted and the kadi recites prayers for a happy and blissful marriage to the couple, he will then read to the groom the duties of a husband, his rights, the dos and don’ts, and also the duties and rights of the wife.
He will mention in particular the stages in pursuing the Islamic divorce and the consequences of reciting divorce intentions including incidences where it is lawful for the wife to seek divorce.
And after the kadi has finished with his advice ( mostly read from prepared text), the groom, acknowledging the advice given, will then sign the formal papers of marriage for official documentation purpose.
What is taklik?
In short, it is the conditions of divorce for the first few months of marriage, according to Islamic laws.
It is being recited after the official solemnization/akad nikah.
Taklik (for those who want to know) which we got from the kadi at ROMM (Registry of Muslim Marriage).
Pada tiap-tiap kali, saya (sebutkan nama sendiri)
- meninggalkan isteri saya, (sebutkan nama isteri) dengan sengaja atau tidak, selama 4 bulan atau lebih, atau
- saya atau wakil saya tidak memberi nafkah kepadanya, selama masa tersebut, sedangkan is taat kepada saya, atau
- saya melakukan sebarang perkara yang mencederakan tubuh badannya atau merosakkan hartabendanya atau menjatuhkan kehormatannya
kemudian mengadu ia kepada Mahkamah Syariah, serta didapati aduannya itu betul, nescaya gugurlah takak isteri itu dengan talak satu.
On every occasion that I (please mention your name)
- leave my wife (mention her name) for a continuous period of 4 months or more, intentionally or unintentionally, or
- fail to maintain her for the said period whereas she is obedient to me or
- commit any action that causes injury to her body or damage to her property or causes her to lose self-respect
and my wife complains to the Syariah Court and if her complaint is proved, then she is divorced by one talak.
What is a Maskahwin (Mahar)?
Mahar is a gift given by the groom to the bride after the solemnization ceremony.
It symbolises the beginning of a husband’s responsibility towards his wife in fulfilling her everyday needs.
Mahar can be in cash or benefits, such as gold, silver or money.
Mahar is the bride’s right and she owns the Mahar.
Thus, she has the will to dispose of it as she wishes.
The current minimum rate for the Mahar in Singapore is S$100 cash.
The last portion
The formalities of the akad nikah being over, the groom now will go to his wife and slip in the marriage ring.
This is essentially a symbol that he now can touch the bride being her lawful husband.
In Islam, males are not allowed to touch unrelated females, and vice versa, unless the skin or parts are covered.
Now, however, as husband and wife there are no such restrictions or prohibitions.
The ceremony ends with the bride kissing the groom’s hands after the placing of the ring.
They will later in the afternoon proceed for the “bersanding” ceremony – sitting “in state” on the pelamin (stage where they sit like a king/queen for a day)- the highlight of a traditional Malay wedding.