I’m… sort of panicking..
There seems to be a hiccup for my wedding preparation.
All I can think of is.. “whatever”.
That’s what happens when I’ve spent too much time and energy on this for a year… alone.
I already have a white flag on my head.
Already asked a few people for help and they couldn’t.
Can’t blame them.. it’s already at the last minute.
Well.. sort of.. 2 weeks more.. but, still.
Now, I feel like putting my stuff away and sulk one side ’cause I pretty much have no mood to work.
My leave starts on Thursday, but, I feel that I need to take a longer time off.
Just to plomp my lifeless body on my bed and cover my face with my pillow.
If this is what they call the jitters to back off from a marriage.
It has been boiling in me for weeks now.
Not because of the preparations though.
I thought I’ve gone through this again and again.
But, I still have a phobia of marriage.
It’s still there hanging around.
Pissing me off.
What am I to do…