I actually haven’t been gaming lately.
A couple of events happened and I was pretty much sucked in to reality.
By the time I had a little free time to game at night, I was always dozing off about 10.

Got a new laptop and mobile phone, given free from and for work.
Placed on 24/7 mode.. not only for IT, but, under another department as well, which I “joined venture” with.
But, that mode is only for emergencies.
My boss knows that I receive work after the usual office hours…
So, he himself proposed that I revisit my timing schedule and be a “freelance” instead of staying in the office all the time.
Which is pretty awesome.. so, I’ll take another month or two to see how to go about with that.
Hope HR hires the right person to work on Applications for my region soon!
I really need this other person around.
It’s just tiresome to get “complaints”  for something I’m not supposed to handle and have no power over.
Plus, feeling sorry for the other end aka UK/US to wake up and handle it.
By the time they wake up, we’re already ending our office hours.

Something else happened between myself and with my mum.
So.. well… somehow, she’s nicer to me now.
Which is great.
الحمد لله
I never gave up loving her.
But, I gave everything else up to God.
After that last depressing episode.. what else could I possibly do anyway.

For myself, I think… my spiritual side is growing stronger.
I don’t know how things will be in the future and I’m not too sure where to start or what exactly I should do.
But, I’m taking things one at a time and hopefully, I’ll find that pathway I should walk on to.

The wedding planning is making me a little stressed.
With about 3+ months left…
There’s nothing much left now, except for getting the bridal clothes set (which we’d be travelling to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia) to have it measured and sewed from scratch!
Plus, the bookings for our trip to Korea after the wedding.
I haven’t planned much at all.
There would still be the small things like the car decoration and the hantaran dishes (gifts) even nearing the date.
Shucks… I have no idea how I’ve done it all by myself the whole time.
I didn’t have my mum, bestie, sister, other family members or friends or even my own other half to help at all.
All I know is that I pretty much lash out to my other half a couple of times after being over-stressed.
Hey… at least I’m honest about it and don’t burden anyone with anything.
In addition to the whole cost being paid 50-50 between the two of us and not a single cent from anyone else.
Not as if we’re rich at all.
When anyone was to ask me about the preparations or if I’m excited… I’ll always bluntly reply that I just want to get over it.
I’m not exactly one to give in when I know it’s not feasible to do something, but, I gave my other half leeway to have quite a big wedding.
Not really sure who he wants to invite… ’cause I’m not exactly a very sociable person.
Not saying that I’m tough to talk to.. just that I love my “me-time”.

For the past week, I always don’t have the appetite to eat dinner.
When I do, I’d eat only a bit before feeling full.
Yet, I’d eat normal doses for breakfast and lunch.
Even if I force myself to eat a lot.. I’d start to feel sick.

Don’t really have a problem with it since it doesn’t seem to affect my health.
My brain works pretty well even with that weird “night-time appetite-loss” happening.
Works quite quick too.
It’s like fasting daily… well.. sort of.. ’cause the last time I’d eat would usually in the afternoon and I won’t eat anything else until the next morning.
Of course I’d be drinking something.
Hmmm… seems like it.

Also, I used to need to drink an energy sports drink in the morning, especially when I’m stressed or mentally drained, but, I’ve stopped that for quite some time.
Somehow, I don’t feel the need to drink it at all.
Still not a fan of caffeine.
The only difference would be that my body has negated the “you won’t be able to sleep if you drink anything with caffeine at 4pm onwards”.
But, I still can’t finish a can of coke.. will feel sick after half a can anyway.

Well, I’m done rambling.


❤ Icesabel






8 thoughts on “Ramblings

  1. You having some busy times going on lady. BUt so nice to her everything is working out and playing out. by trial. Keeping up with he new job. getting closer to your wedding day and to hear you done it all yourself.
    I would so slap the other half. LOL you want this to so help.
    ha ha
    to funny.

    keep on smiling it suits you best.
    As health wise. breakfast and lunch are most important. But keep watching yourself.

  2. Hey my friend take it easy and congrats on the new job and wedding. Hope all it all goes well. By the way I’m sure the bride is entitled to lash out and stress a bit. Anyway good luck there’s an awesome future waiting for you 😀

  3. Hello! We’ve been following each others blogs for some time now & I just want to say that I hope everything ends up ok. There are those times which really seem to stretch a person! You are in my thoughts/prayers!


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