Settle down

Dear Diary,

I truly.. really.. have to thank those who have been backing me up even when I have asked for none.
It wasn’t their life to begin with.
Although, it’ll probably affect them in/directly one way or another.
But, life can go on and eventually people can adapt to the changes anyway.

Like I’ve mentioned in an earlier entry, I held up a white flag and allowed time to determine where I should go instead.
I was joking about whilst most of them had a straight face.
Can’t help it if I need to shave off the feeling of uneasiness and emotional lethargy as of late.

Yes, I still feel like the bad one in the picture.
No matter what others say or how they see it.

I told the truth.
Just the plain painful truth.
I didn’t care how people were to judge me.
You like it.. fine.. you hate it.. fine.
I’m just tired of spending too long over such a matter.

I did get what I wanted though.
Best of both worlds.
I couldn’t ask for more.
Thank you, God.
Thank you all.

I was reminded of why I do not want compliments of any sort.
Not only because I don’t know how to handle compliments.
My IQ drops to a zero when that happens.
But, negativity tags along.
There will always be something or someone bad tagging along.
Who’d want to see the worst of me.
But, I’ll take that one at a time.
Think about it later, as and when it comes.

I’ll still remember how I started out.
How tough it was.
To see myself get past the barriers and getting on is exhilarating.

There were reasons to why I was rejected here and there.
There were reasons to why I couldn’t achieve certain things.
Brought me here to explain in conjunction with giving me the so-called results.

Sooner or later, you get answers.
Whether you like it or not.

 

❤ Icesabel

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