Crap

I really really really feel like shit since last night.

I was frustrated with a person because no matter how patient I’ve been with her and spoke nicely to her…
Plus, with a few people who are more knowledgeable inclined to agree with my perspective.
She took a step further and still wanted to do things her way.
I lost my cool, couldn’t take her attitude (actually, right from the beginning) and burst out raising my voice and scolding her.

In many ways than one, although, everyone around me stood by my choice to do so and some wished they had done what I did.
She seem to have step over her boundaries on many occasions and everyone was still cool about it, while I gave way.
They either were extremely patient, couldn’t care less about her and gave zero attention to her or pretended she wasn’t there or didn’t dare to speak out.
Yet, everyone knows that nobody likes her.
It was at the worst time to deal with me, whatnot with me stressed with the more important issues at work.
I actually don’t even care what anyone does as long as they don’t demand the impossible and think that they’re always right.
Things change and you have to adapt… get on with it.

She could’ve just agree upon an alternative solution.
Everyone else is doing the same and no one needed a common sense explication to be created into a scene.
She even brushed away her own boss who tried to help her.
He’s too nice a person.

It was so frustrating that it took hours before I could cool myself down afterwards.
What’s there to be giving kudos to me by others when I feel like shit for doing so.
Heck.. even the highest ranked director was making fun of me saying that I’m like Steven Spielberg’s Carrie.

I could see her squirming away with saying everyone is giving her a hard time.
She didn’t even notice that she has been stepping over people’s heads all these years.
I could hear her call up someone to say the people here aren’t being patient.
She didn’t know how EVERYONE except me who finally lost my cool have been patient to her.

I actually feel ashamed of myself for going there.
I’ve scolded some, but not as horribly as I did to her.
Probably had given her a piece of my mind and on behalf of everyone else.
Which I think is beyond harsh, from my stance.

All I want from her is to wake up and see everything and everyone around her.
Not expecting anyone to please everyone.
But, if everyone is going against you, there’s obviously something wrong with you.
How can you be so oblivious with that fact unless you’re so self-absorbed and living in your own world?

 

❤ Icesabel

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8 thoughts on “Crap

  1. Sorry where is the problem? It is with her. She is blind and dumb to notice.
    Did you lie when you told her nobody liked her. Did you lie when you told her she should consider others. No. than what is the problem.
    I know this is very short sighted. But at some point enough is enough. Don’t get twisted over it. if you do she wins again. And walks away smiling.
    You are better than her. So keep that chin up and smile. And next time hold a piece of paper in her face where she signs to take full responsibility if things go wrong.
    Keep Smiling Icesabel. deep breath brush off and moving forward.

    I to as always the one saying what others always talked about behind their backs. At least i dare to say what is on my mind instead of being talking behind the backs.

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