Daily Prompt: My Number One.
Who is the most important person in your life? Describe that person in as great a detail as you can muster and most importantly, tell us why you cherish this person.
Photographers, artists, poets: show us CHERISH.
It’s not easy to choose between so many people whom you love.
But, even if I wanted to beat around the bush about it, people would still know that my number one would be my mum.
(Who knows, some day, it might be my own kid instead.)
Simply because she’s the one I talk about the most in my blog other than my other half.
I will never tire on talking about her.
I am her second child.
Two years younger than my older brother and four years older than my younger brother.
The problematic one who dared to defy her house rules.
The black sheep of the family, who always wanted to do what I wish to, even when disapproved of.
She carried me around for months until the Christmas eve evening of the early 1980s.
I was a breech baby and due to complications, nearly died from birth.
But still… lived on to be the first baby born when the clock struck twelve.
As with most people, I can barely recall my youth of before I reached 6 years of age.
But, she said that I was a real chore.
I would cry whenever we travelled around.
Growing up with my brothers and closer to my dad, I became a tomboy for years to come.
I lived with my grandparents until I was 15, whereby I then moved in back to my parents’.
I used to think that we were poor, but, I realised many years later, that it was simply because I wasn’t spoiled.
I was brought up the way I should be, as planned by my grandparents and her.
We had ground rules of Islamic prayers, fasting, studies and whatnot.
I’ve always known that she was working hard for all of us.
Although my parents were constantly busy with work, she would take every chance to see us.
Take us out for picnics and fed us good and healthy food (she’s a nurse).
It was in her youth that she had a tough life.
Her family was dirt poor.
Although being the second child, even while schooling, she would sell food to make ends meet, do all the chores and take care of all her 6 siblings.
While my grandparents worked hard as well.
Forgoing her dreams to further her studies, she took care of her family.
Although she never mentioned it, but, I’m sure that she was the the most responsible and intelligent of them all.
Through that, she tried forging the same concept onto us… onto me.
I would say, she did well in that.
But, having a hard life never brought her down.
Working hard, she would save up to travel and has been around Europe before she got married.
She saved up for her own wedding as well. (As I’m doing the same)
Once in a while, I hear her tell me, do what you want to before you get fixed down with marriage.
But, I never understood the meaning behind it until I was more matured.
When she opened up to me once in a while, she once told me she won third prize in a pageant.
A lot of suitors came up to her, lawyers, doctors and businessmen, but, she rejected them one by one.
Until she met my dad, the poor engineer, who, in my opinion reminds me a lot of my other half who’s annoyingly irritating, because they’d make weird jokes and whatnot.
Haha.. I pixelated the guy’s face out because I have no idea who he is.
As much as he’s pretty good looking, he’s not my dad, so, he has got to be negated out of the picture.
Truth be told, she was rebellious in her youth just as well.
Amongst my siblings, I was endowed with most of her (bad) qualities.
The stubborn and impatient fighter who refuse to back down at any point in time.
But, she is my role model nonetheless.
She’s intelligent, strong, beautiful (inside and out), kind, loving, respected… a woman of qualities.
She is loved by those around her.
Constantly was acclaimed with affirmations from her patients and those she work with.
When she was not on duty, they’d want her around, and she even got requests.
Not once would she show her true feelings, thus, she’s good at showing how strong she is on the outside.
But, I’ve seen her other side.
Even when she tries to hide it.
How can she?
I’m her mirror image, I know how it goes.
Us siblings make her worry often.
She’s a worry-wart and a perfectionist.
But, in my opinion, she has done her best all these years.
Truth be told, she doesn’t need to worry at all.
Even the most rebellious one aka me, believes so.
Looking at each of us, we’ve not broken the most important values.
Ok.. I can be annoyingly dumb, but, if I can’t help it.
Hey, I was only rebellious because, in my opinion,
- She was afraid I wouldn’t do well in my main education if I were to spend time on what I loved doing, in art, music, performing and sports. So, although she said no to me doing these, I still did so because I believed that there was nothing wrong with doing these. I only wished she had been around to see me win all those prizes, achievements, performances and accolades. But, yes, I will remember that one time when she finally came to watch me perform live at a public place together with my band. I won’t do that, mum. I wouldn’t let you down. If anything, I’d want you to be proud of me.
- She was afraid that I would lose my way (such as being broken-hearted and depressed) and chastity if I had a bf. Learned it all the hard way, but, when else will I learn? She became frustrated because of my exs, including my current other half.
- She didn’t like the way I dressed because I was supposed to be covered up, since we’re Muslims, but, well, heh… ok.. that was my choice and still wrong. I will NOT say that she did it as well, so, it’d be fine for me as well. It’s well stated out there. No blaming games here. My choice, my fault.
We’ve been through tough times together as a family.
Really rough seas which nearly broke us up many times.
When she finally approves of my wedding (indirectly) and gave her blessings, was I totally relieved.
We might not be the best of friends, but, I will always remember the small things she did specially for me.
It was because of the distance between us that made me appreciate every little thing.
I don’t really care though.
I mean, it was her choice to be pissed at me for so many things.
The only thing I could do was stay away from her wrath and did as much as possible to not anger her.
It wasn’t until when I found out that she cared so much about what my relatives would think of us.
Maybe because we made a “perfect” picture.
Every fault would be magnified by others.
I don’t care what they think though.
I know how much problems they give us, including the current problem we’re having.
Not once did I see any of their faces at our place to see their own mother (my grandma).
Yet, my father’s side would come by instead.
Much less only want what my grandparents have/will leave them with.
They will fight greedily.
They have been and will always be.
If my own closest family is all and well and they don’t touch them, they can dwell in their own lives.
I will not hate, but, will watch their actions and words as I always do.
It’s called what goes around comes around.
I don’t see why my mum still has to suffer or worry.
Her kids are doing pretty well with our own lives.
Not saying it’s perfect as life has its ups and downs.
Pretty ok in an average term.
She might not be a perfect mum.
I’d probably would’ve preferred her to support my decisions since I was young.
Then, I’d probably would’ve made even further.
But, I wouldn’t want to blame her anyway, because, she had it tough in her own timeline.
Yes, she is my number one.