Malay Weddings

For those who don’t know, one of my grandparents was Chinese, one was Malay-Arab, one was Banjarese, Indo and one is Minang of Padang, Indo.
But, I grew up around the Malay community, although, I have way more Singapore-Chinese and those of other races friends than Malay friends.
Long story to why, but, I’m not here to talk about that topic.


My wedding package is inclusive of 2 Malay dance performances, but, since we’re not into those stuff, we removed that out of the list.

Mehh… this isn’t going to happen.

Instead, on top of the traditional and must-have Kompang troupe, I would LOVE to have a Silat performance instead. ❤ ❤ ❤

The Kompang is a traditional musical instrument, a drum, of the Malay culture.
I have no idea how it started or who started the tradition.
But, the Kompang troupe will play on the kompang and sing melodiously as they usher the couple to the event location where the couple is seated at, usually somewhere from the entrance of the destination.

Credits: jonetgetsmarried.blogspot

Yesssssss… persembahan silat, please!

Credits: nasilemaklover.blogspot

The reason why I would lurvvvve this is because I was from the Silat in my teens.
One of those who have traveled around the island of Singapore to perform a number of times together with one of my other girlfriends and the rest, who were guys, but, for town councils events of some sort.
This time around, I’d like someone to perform for my day instead!



There are other varieties of entertainment other people would include…

Malay Karaoke.
It doesn’t matter whether the singer is a professional one or those friends or family who would randomly steal the mic and sing out of the blue.
I don’t mind karaoke in general.
It’s the wedding karaoke that irritates me.
Only because they start singing Malay songs.
But, I’m not the only one, from my generation onwards, who are against Malay wedding karaoke ’cause I’ve seen, heard and know of a lot of the younger ones against it too!!!!!
Unless their parents forces them to have it so.

I’ve not seen a Kuda Kepang performance for a very long time, it’s known to be forbidden in Islam, because it’s known to be using black magic.
Well, I’m one of those soul-sensitive people who can sense something is amiss (the real ones, not those staged kinds), so, I tend to avoid watching nearby, if there ever was one around.
The true-blue ones that even include whipping people of some sort and getting possessed and eating glass back when it was still around when I was a little kid.
I never understood why they’d do so, but, apparently, those people enjoyed these kind of shows.

Credits: longnwindingroad.wordpress

Tee hee.. not really that proud of myself to admit, but, I’ve performed dikir barat twice.. or was it thrice, whilst in my mid teens in school.
Loud, fun, awesome entertainment event which I do watch when there is one being performed.
But, this one isn’t as popular for weddings though.

Credits: Enrick Hoh

Okay, this isn’t part of a wedding thingy (although, it is used in the kuda kepang music orchestra).
Since, my Mother’s parents and grandparents are from Indonesia, in addition to have being brought up by their culture, my grandma and great-grandma taught me to play the bonang, part of the Gamelan traditional musical instruments, while they sang songs in a language unknown to me.
Not the usual Bahasa Indonesia or Bahasa Melayu, but, of their own, which sound nothing like what I have knowledge of.

Credits: Mindy Mcadams

Our culture is rich in tradition and there are a whole load of things that aren’t pertaining to weddings itself.
Although I choose to live within a more “westernized culture”, I can’t say that I’ve never been indulging myself in all the culture of my own race.

Sure, there are a lot of things that I don’t really enjoy, for example, for no particular reason, I am unable to enjoy any kind of Malay dance, not that I hate it, but, it bores me to death.
But, I’m not saying that I hate all kinds of dance performances because I’ve been performing dance routines way before I was a teen.



On a personal note…

Don’t ask me how I managed to do so much during my youth.
Just the kind who would try anything and everything that I felt that I wanted to, even if my strict mum disapproves of it.
HAH! All the more will I break her rules.
Ummm.. probably why I’m the black sheep.
But, /sigh… if she was to see it from my point of view, she would’ve been proud of all my achievements.

It’s just that, I believe in living in my own dreams, not to live within what a parent wants me to do.
Not that she ever enforced anything that would undermine me of choosing what career I wanted to pursue in.

But, don’t mind me saying this.
I love her with all the strictness and of her choices in words and actions.
Without her being this strict, I’d probably not have my own set of mindset that sets me apart from societies’ notions on so many levels.
Weird… but, I like being weird.


❤ Icesabel


2 thoughts on “Malay Weddings

  1. your culture is rich in tradition, Isn’t it also sometimes hard to find something that isn’t against religion while keeping up with tradition. As you said about the Kuda Kepang. I know it is a choice but doesn’t it sometimes make it difficult to honour a tradition.
    keep smiling. and wish you a wonderful beautiful wedding in advance.

    • Nope. I don’t think it’s a problem since that itself isn’t something prominent. Sure, it is probably a tradition for one race or culture, but, I personally do not feel easy with it either.

      I actually do not know who’s tradition it was to have that one. We kind of melted down a lot of things around the neighbouring countries between Malaysia and Indonesia.

      Plus, we aren’t exactly just one race. Like me, even though my grandparents are both from Indo, they are of different races from different regions with different lifestyles.


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