Gold Farming!!! $_$ <3 <3

Been bored with no aim in D3 lately.
D3 has been a “filler” in my life (reference to “anime filler”).
>_<

My hubby has been gold farming for some time already and asking if I wanted to make one.
I digress from the idea.
Until I realised that I couldn’t find another imperfection that my beloved Wiz possess.
I started making maxed-out gems for 3 other chars… making me poor.. I had 5 mil left.
“Sadly”, I gave up and in… he took a look at my naked WD, the items in my bank ans tweaked accordingly.
Bam~
I got addicted to gold farming now.

It’s somewhat similar to the on in this video.

Ohhh baby.. I feel rich!
Well, in-game… at least.. rofl~

Took me a couple of hours to find the treasure goblin portal (lost it on the first one because I didn’t know it’d close after a few minutes! I nearly cried when it disappear.
But, found another in an hour’s time.
Killed the Greed boss swiftly and obtained my Boon of the Hoarder.
Even without upgrading this, it’s already a real gem.. literally.

I only ran through the Core of Arreat and reset once I reach the Azmodan WP.
The quickest and since it’s a one-way map.
But, others tend to find some other locations just as good, such as tower of damned lvl 1-2, tower of the cursed lvl 1-2 and festering woods.

Toughness love… just wear a Goldwrap and stand there like a boss.. whilst your cute wakawaka minions cut open the mobs.
Wear some inc dmg against elites items, so, you can move on quickly.
Of course your +gold items needs to be there.
Add in Custerian Wristguards for added xp or Avarice Band/Profane Pauldrons for expanded pickup radius.

A lot of nice places to farm, but, Ruins of Corvus onwards is definitely the best right now.
Because of the mob called “Scarab”.
They pretty much spawn on nearly every corner of the walls and they come in abundance.

Loving this~ <3

<3 Icesabel

Tmr

Why did my boss even send me a 1-to-1 invite to talk out of the blue tomorrow?
I know.. I should wait… but, I’ve already been feeling frustrated as of lately…
That it has built so much tension within me that I feel like I might explode if I don’t rant for a couple.

I don’t know whether I’ve stepped over my boundary.
Been trying to get a lot of things done for the countries.. for my regional IT team (which I’ve mentioned before.. is scaling down).
Honestly, I’m not even a manager.
Well, that’s not the name of the position.
It’s a “specialist”, but, I do work under the Regional Manager for my region who works for the CIO.
Extremely flat hierarchy.

Whatever that my regional IT team from each country asks me for help.. I’m there.
I know how it is because I’ve been there and I’m still there.
So, I sent out bits and pieces of requests directly to the HQ to get things done.

I know myself.
If I want something, I’ll go out and get it, if, I have the means.
My mum used to always tell me “anything is possible”.
I’d add ” if you put your head and heart in it”.

At times, when the other regions or HQ doesn’t do something about something, I’d do it first.
/shrugs
If I know my team needs it, I don’t want to wait until the sky falls down.
Probably due to my impatient attitude.

There is one more person way more feisty than me who’d pilot way more projects than any others globally-combined.
Don’t think that’s an exaggeration either.
One of the most intelligent and capable leader I’ve ever met.
The only country team in the world that works with the HQ closely.

I don’t even have half of what he owns to be who he is.
But, I do what I can… and yeah… sometimes, I wish I can be just like him.
More assertive.. brilliant in any work that is planned out and done.
He’s always thinking up so many things to make a more positive impact for everyone.

But, this time around, I’ve got a feeling that I’ve pushed past my boundary.
Not scared though.
It’s a big project.
Everyone is involved, but, I don’t know whether I’m pushing them too much.
After all, they’ve been asking the region to do something about this and that.
I don’t see much changes, so, I went ahead and started this.

I’ve been doing a lot of stretch projects since I joined this organisation.
Lucky for me, my boss would acknowledge and if anyone were to ask about it, they’re well informed that I piloted it.
He would support any projects that our team decide to take up.
But, sometimes, I wish he would be the one pushing for all these instead of me and lead.

I guess, at times, I also get a little agitated when the IT managers from some of the countries seem to take things slowly.
Yet, they’re asking for instantaneous results of assistance.
Makes me feel as though I have a lot of time in my hands and they’re too busy.T_T

There’s actually a horrible negative vibe in the physical office since this year.
I haven’t talk about it, but, I don’t think I want to either way.

So.. adding these points to the earlier thoughts/blog about wanting to move along.

Just heard from our security director about one of my regional IT guys being shot last night after coming back from playing sports.
What the…
Doing ok now, but… wondering why this was done.
/sigh
It wasn’t even from one of the higher risks countries.
He’s younger than me and always bursting of energy… talkative and always helpful.
Hope he gets better soon.

Well… lets just see what it’s about tomorrow.

<3 Icesabel

Movie Theatres – Just a thought

I’ve been watching too many video games being played by people.
(Too lazy to play my own game other than D3).
One of which triggered my imagination on movies and movie theatres.

You know those games where they’re more of a story-mode or storytelling session rather than doing something in the game?
Ok…
Now imagine that at different parts of a movie, it stops and the movie-goers would have to vote to what the character (at that moment) wants to take up.
Ladder A? Corridor B? Basement C?
Majority wins.
Thus, the movie theatre would need those voting equipment set up just like those tv “live voting system” shows.

It’d be a lot of work on the part of the production of the movie.
Having to have alternative storylines and endings.
A movie can have 5 endings?
That’s mainly because of the choices made by the movie goers.
Meaning that the story cannot be those “I predict it to be …. in the next scene”.

What if they decide to have a Part 2?
5 endings wouldn’t be a feasible feat.
Probably one ending, no matter what choices that were made in between.

You know those movie theatres that allow you to either purchase and watch either a 3D version or a normal 2D version?
Thus, you can have the vote-availability version and the normal version.
The normal version would be based on the “original” story line.

On the aftermath…
When you purchase the DVD or download the movie, will there ever be a choice or the usage of some sort of software or equipment to make these “votes” and watch to your hearts contents on all the different paths and endings that the choices lead you to?

Then again…
I’m just imagining too much!
+_+

 

<3 Icesabel

Flying Away

It’s been a long time… since I updated.
Been wanting to update many times before, but, just decided to delete it eventually.
But… this time around… I just can’t hold back the overwhelming sadness.

There is not a day without so many issues at a time.
Can’t say it’s horrible… but, I can’t say that it’s good either.
One of the problems constitute my career.
Holding back isn’t fun when the people around me keep bringing up a bleak future.
This year alone, the number of people, I like working with, leaving is more than the last 2 years added together.
It’s… depressing.

Told myself to check on myself at the end of this year.
Can’t believe it’s already October.
Realising that it’s going to be a stagnant position.
I don’t exactly hate this.
I like it, but, it’s not going to help me on my self-declared development and to allow my short span of attention to dwell in the kingdom of boredom (not because of not enough work or problems, but, the shortage of excitement in new things).

Heck… I’ve even been dreaming of getting to new places (while asleep… not daydreaming).
That feeling where there’s this anger within trying to break out because you’re slowly dying of boredom.
>_>
In fact, I’ve been thinking of moving out of this field.
Or at the very least… change the area of expertise… I’m unsure.

Although, I’m itching to open my own business (again).
Not doing IT though.
I just want a change in pace.
A change in view.

I can’t see myself being a high-ranked IT personnel any more.
It’s as though that vision has already gone to a halt.
Back in my teenage years, I wanted to do what I’m doing right now.
Now that I’ve satisfied my craving, I want to break out of this shell.
Others are thinking of “settling down” to a fixed income as they grow older.
I’m thinking of the exact opposite.

It wasn’t any fun crying and breaking down countless times back then.
But, the satisfaction of being steps ahead afterwards was so good.
Being independent and most of all… prove people otherwise.
WAS.

Alright… I’m done whining.
Time to start re-evaluating and planning for my next course in life.

 

<3 Icesabel

HeforShe?

This news was a few days back, but, if you didn’t know, I’ll post a snippet of it.

~~~~~

Emma Watson’s “HeforShe” Speech as UN Women Goodwill Ambassador
UN Women

Actor and UN Women Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson gave a game-changing speech at the UN about feminism and the need for gender equality. Her speech kicked off the HeforShe campaign, which encourages men to join the fight for gender equality. Full transcript: http://owl.li/BSbad

Some of our favorite excerpts:

“I started questioning gender-based assumptions when at eight I was confused at being called “bossy,” because I wanted to direct the plays we would put on for our parents—but the boys were not. When at 14 I started being sexualized by certain elements of the press. When at 15 my girlfriends started dropping out of their sports teams because they didn’t want to appear “muscly.” When at 18 my male friends were unable to express their feelings.”

“Men—I would like to take this opportunity to extend your formal invitation. Gender equality is your issue too.”

“If men don’t have to be aggressive in order to be accepted women won’t feel compelled to be submissive. If men don’t have to control, women won’t have to be controlled. Both men and women should feel free to be sensitive. Both men and women should feel free to be strong… It is time that we all perceive gender on a spectrum not as two opposing sets of ideals.
If we stop defining each other by what we are not and start defining ourselves by what we are—we can all be freer and this is what HeforShe is about. It’s about freedom.”

“You might be thinking who is this Harry Potter girl? And what is she doing up on stage at the UN. It’s a good question and trust me I have been asking myself the same thing. I don’t know if I am qualified to be here. All I know is that I care about this problem. And I want to make it better.”

“In my nervousness for this speech and in my moments of doubt I’ve told myself firmly—if not me, who, if not now, when. If you have similar doubts when opportunities are presented to you I hope those words might be helpful.”

– UN Women Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson.

~~~~~

Before I had time to read more about it, I thought… “here comes another feminist debate that will just be cut short eventually”.
But, found out that it was more of gender equality rather than being one sided.

There has always been sort of expectations out of your gender.
In my timeline, that was back when I was still in school.

When I delved into the working world, people were more open and weren’t exactly (sure, there’s still some to a certain degree) following the stigma of men and women having to act or behave in certain ways.
Sure, people try to blend in depending in different situations, but, outside of that “box” such as at work and whatnot… it’s pretty different.
Times are changing.

I have seen more men crying in the open than women.
Those “definitions” are still floating around.
It’s a matter of whether you’d care what others would say about it.

Maybe I’m one of those who’d do what I want, when I know what I want.
In a sense, that uncertainty scares people.

I’ve been there.
In a feminist point of view, I’ve been told that I couldn’t get the job I wanted to take up because it was “meant” to be for men.
Gave excuses on why they wanted men instead of women for the job.
I was just starting out, a fresh graduate and someone who was still so naive and emotionally weak from the reality of the harsh world ahead of me.
The good thing is that, I turned out to be a fierce tiger, who can take charge and the people around me knows that all too well.
The “bad” thing is, in the view of other people, I’m not being “womanly”.
I don’t care though.
What is their view to mine?
If I had stuck to their view, I wouldn’t have been happy with my own choices and the dreams I wanted to reach back then.
It would’ve turned out to be filling in the voids of other people’s “choices” based on what the different genders should do.

In my humble point of view (based on my own experience) – apologies in advance, if that doesn’t work well in your community…
There has always been freedom.

People just tend to keep themselves within the bubble of society’s norm.
Then, blame others for their choices.

You did have a choice to do sports as a girl.
Why should you care whether you’d be deemed or seen as more of an athletic build rather than that of a model build who most people see as “perfect”?
Media fed that to you.
So did the brainwash from school, your own community, the circle of friends, etc.
Even with all those negativity around you, you still had the choice to break free from that and be different.
Be yourself.
Love yourself.

Do what you want.
Who’s.. or even what’s stopping you?
The ideals?

You want to know what’s the reality of gender inequality?
The one that piss me off the most (based on my own experience), that I get paid less than those who work lesser than me in my industry.
But, well… I worked it out eventually.
It is NOT a myth that there is a glass ceiling for women.
It’s fine though because it used to be like so.. but, as I’ve said before, I changed.
Fought for what I wanted.
The stigma of women’s rights and standing is based on what they were brought up, and influenced as they grow older, to think.
It’s as real as the air that you breathe.
One example: women tend to think that they don’t deserve the credit and spread the credits to their colleagues even when they do most of the work.
Whilst men tend to take it all for themselves.
It came naturally to me as I grew up as well.
But, when I got angry at the known unjust issue in my own life situation, I did what the men did instead.
It was until much later than I realised that this was one of the examples that successful women state that most women don’t even realise they’re doing to undermine their abilities, skills, etc.

Yet, not everyone wants to do so even after explaining of the other side.
A small percentage might try to change.
Whilst others tend to be “an old dog” who prefers to stick to their regime, yet, keep whining about the same problem continuously.
Oh well~

LOL.. I didn’t mean to talk crap… but.. just thought I’d say something about it.
>_<

<3 Icesabel

Where the ladies at?

Ooooh yeah… finally!
Hired someone to administer the applications for Asia.
IT is always not seen as something important (for eg: IT is last for budget reviewing) everywhere.
Not sure which generation they’re still living in though.
At least, someone’s going to be around for Asia’s time-zone.
Although our “ranks” are pretty much on par, I look up to her.
I mean.. I dropped apps, programming, databases, websites, etc… hated doing those.
Seeing all the issues the different apps guys in HQ have been picking up.. I’d say.. she has to carry a huge bag.

I’ve just realised only 1 out of 30 IT peeps is a lady for our Asia region.
2nd lady on a regional level (for IT)… none from Europe, America, Middle East, Africa, Oceania, etc!!!
Also… the fact that she’s an Indonesian!
Ok.. well.. I’m only half Indo because of my mum and her family, although, she’s born here.
Idk… for some reason, that kinda made me excited.
Hur hur hur~

 

<3 Icesabel

Wedding Photo-Shoot

OMG! I’m so in love with ALL the photos!!!
We’ve gotten our raw unedited version of the photos from our photo-shoot in Seoul, Korea.
In my POV, they’re already perfect enough to need to edit anything.
Sure.. there are the random imperfections.. but, nah… it’s awesome enough for me.
Well, except for one blue screen, which will be a picture in that picture. XD

It’s worth every single cent spent on this!
Thank you IDO Wedding and Photo-shoot location #17!!!

Without much further ado, here they are! <3

 

<3 Icesabel

Kenshin and a few other updates

Watched Rurouni Kenshin: Kyoto Inferno with a few friends last night.
It was… AWESOME.. from the beginning to the end!

Of all the older anime and manga, I didn’t pick this up.
Neither did I watch the first movie instalment a few years back.
But, weird enough, Himura Kenshin was one of the anime/manga characters that I used to draw (using my graphite B-set pencils and drawing paper) because I found him to be elusively striking with his scar as I browsed through the long list of anime/manga online ages back… strong, fierce and good-looking.

But, still, I promise that as long as you’re a fan of manga/anime, Japanese culture/old-era backdrop and/or fighting scenes using the oldskool katana and whatnot, you’re in for a good two-hours journey.
The poster showed that the second part, meaning 2nd part of the 2nd movie will be shown on 2nd October.
Can’t wait for for it.

Unfortunately, I’m unable to say any more than that because I know nuts about the true storyline.
Roflmao~

 

 

Ok.. back to reality.

The most popular questions I’ve been getting since I came back to “reality” are:
How was your honeymoon? (and more in-depth questions about where I travelled)
Notice any difference between being bf/gf and being a married couple? (then concluded on their own, “it’ll change… you’ll see”)

If it’s possible, I’d love to stay in Korea longer.
Unfortunately, I might eventually suffer because I’m known to have difficulties in breathing in cold dry air, once it starts to turn autumn and then winter.
Most of them cannot even speak English and with most menu and words in their language, it’s already tough enough to find Halal food, plus they usually add Pork to most food, so.. that’s a total bust.

I didn’t say things won’t change.
I know it will.
Most, if not all people know nuts about my history between him and me.
The difficult times we went through the past 10 years.
He was there.
No one else was there.
And him back to me as well… all his issues and problems revolving around him and us.
We’re still here.. and have tied the knot.

What all those breakdowns have taught us is to push the negativity of others.
Learned to ignore people who mean nothing, yet, would try to cause problems for others.
Fight for our place.
We fought all the time.
Probably one of those weird couples who make others terrified with our daily quarrels of nothingness.
Then, we forget.
We’re opposite polars that attract.
We share common goals and love the similar things.

We did change throughout those years.
And in more years to home (In Sya Allah)… I know we will change.. evolve with time and changes of environment and situation.
There will always be problems, in and out.
That’s life.

We cry.. fight.. get scared.. feel lost… but, we also laugh and smile.. hold each other up.
It won’t be perfect and we know that first hand because we’ve been through our own set of problems.
It will be different, when did I ever deny that since I was young?
I’ve always been different and to always dream that things will always get better as time goes by.

But, they don’t need to know this.
All I’d reply with is “I know”.
Even how sceptical they are to my monotonous reciprocation.

The bad and good makes us grow.. because the choices we make, will turn us to be who we eventually truly are (and should be).

 

There hasn’t really been a few days of “relaxation” since I came back to “reality”.
Problems have been pouring in, one after another.
Reason why I didn’t want to blog for the past few days is because I’ve been bogged down with so much.
And it’s only been… what?… 2 weeks? Wow~
Even if I thought that I wanted to blurt everything out by blogging, I don’t think it’d worth it at all.
I’ve been having a biting feeling (before I got married) that a few of these problems will come into place.
In fact, the problems don’t lie in us or our relationship as a couple.
But, everything and everyone around us seems to be causing (or even trying) to make us quarrel.
These.. what I’d call tests.. have been pushing their luck on my patience and whether I’d submit to do the right thing.

But, because of all these, I see positive changes.. small ones.. but, surely seeping through to make ends meet.

All I know is that, this is just the beginning and the past 10 years was just the stepping stones to start a new chapter.

 

Cheers~
<3 Icesabel

My Wedding + bestmen singing + yoyo performance

I don’t have the “official” pictures and video for the wedding as I’ve just gotten back from my honeymoon.
Will be collecting it from the photography company we’ve hired end of this week.
But, I’ve got a few from friends and whatnot.
XD

 

This was the first set of clothes right after the Akad Nikah.

The second set (with my god-brother).

Our epic wedding picture! <3

Side view.. heavy stuff on my head.. hate it.
Could barely move my head to the right or left.
='(

Third set (with someone I used to be close with whilst in secondary school).

The pretty bridesmaids!

2 of the 5 bestmen doing a performance – a song by John Legend: All of me.

Fajar Siddiq and Thawhir Yao doing a Yo-Yo performance for us!

 

Apparently, his mum decided to ask the DJ to announce him to go down from the stage to perform (after years of not practising) for everyone.
This old skool boy used to joined the Asia championship in his early teens in Japan.

Kompang.. bunga manggar.. and a silat performance afterwards.

 

~~~~~

I’ll update again once I get the official pictures and nitpick on the main ones.

~~~~~

Oh yes.. a little preview of our post-wedding photos done in Seoul, South Korea.

~~~~~

The awkward moment when…

  1. Everyone (including the Korean staff for our photoshoot) keeps thinking that we married way too early because they thought we were in our early 20s.
  2. Elixir of youth!!! Nah… both of our genetics. A compliment.. considering we’re in the land of “plastics” who are able to look young themselves.
  3. Koreans were asking me for directions whilst we were lost ourselves! (Do I look Korean as well? I was always being called a local in so many Asian countries whilst travelling in Thailand, Indonesia, Myanmar, Malaysia… at home, I’m being asked whether I’m from Philippines and Japan.) XD
  4. Language was a barrier and we had to move about to find our way or purchase something or whatever that needs communication done.
  5. We were hungry most of the time because they were selling pork with mostly everything. So, we had to keep going to find somewhere where we could have our meal. >_<

 

<3 Icesabel

One Day to Go

Scared and stressed… for no reason.. at least, for now.
I’m already disappointed that a lot of my closer friends couldn’t attend.

I’m totally running away.
I’ve booked a hotel room in Singapore for 2 nights before flying off to South Korea for 2 weeks.
The real stress starts after that, but… I don’t want to think about it.

 

I’ve just taken off my braces of 4 years, yesterday!
It feels… weird… without something clinging to my teeth.

The clothes have been sent to my house.
Decorations are being done right now at the location.
Food is being cooked.
Bla bla bla..
I was already over stressed yesterday because there were a few hiccups and they were expecting me to do something?

I wasn’t a Bridezilla until 2 weeks back.
I noticed that, but, I couldn’t help lashing out every time a problem arises.
Shucks… sure, I was a perfectionist years back, but, I don’t really nitpick on stuff that can be compromised when I’ve stopped being one.
But, this time around.. maybe… because it’s my big day… that’s what people always say.. “big day”.

 

<3 Icesabel

مغروم

The cake-cutting song I’ve chosen is Pasha Feat Adelia – Penghujung Cintaku.

But, for the walk-in, the earlier song I’ve chosen was K-Hunter’s Marry Me.
I’ve, kind of, changed my mind.
I’d love it if it’s this one instead.
Toni Qattan – Maghroum / طوني قطان – مغروم

Translation:

In Love

My heart is in love and I’ve never loved anyone else other than you
I swear I’ll burn if you’re not mine

I only want you
Tell me what more would I need if I’ve got you?
My hearts only feels you
Now my heart only beats for you

My heart is in love and I’ve never loved anybody else other than you
I swear I’ll burn if you’re not mine

I’ll go crazy if they take you away from me
They will not give you another guy, other than me
I know that even if they blame you
You will be mine

Tell your family that I’m coming to ask for your hand
I swear I’ll commit a crime if they don’t accept us

 

<3 Icesabel

Hair.. done..

And the reason why I can’t be bothered to post so much pictures of myself is because I look the same in most of the pictures…
No use in posting the “same” pictures again and again.
XD

 

But… I got my hair dyed yesterday at Lacoco Korean Hair Salon at Vivocity by Paul.
I actually wanted it to be a lighter shade of brown, equivalent to some hair extensions I bought 2 years back for one of my hair dye job.
Unfortunately, it turned out to be a very dark brown and Paul offered that I only paid for the treatment and come back next month to re-dye my hair to a lighter tone.
I was fine with it actually.
But, since I needed some hair boost, I bought a hair extension from LYs for my wedding event just now.
The same place I bought my earlier extension.
If I’m not wrong, I’ve only actually worn the “old” extension 3 or 4 times.
I don’t really like “things” on my head… lol~
I think I bought that one on impulse because they looked pretty… lmao~
No one seemed to know that it’s fake even though they said that my hair looked really nice during those rare occasions and were wondering what was different.
They look and feel natural, but, they’re synthetic hair extensions.
Just needed a hair boost for my wedding as I’ve got super fine and limp hair (the oily scalp is not helping the situation at all).
And they’d probably look “dead” if I don’t have them on.

 

<3 Icesabel

Paradoxical

Ummm.. nah.. I’m neither feeling depressed nor confused of any sort.
Just remembered that I’ve got a number of poems stuck in my old bag that I found a few days back when I was spring cleaning my stuff out.
Forgotten to upload the rest of my artwork.. but… hummm~ nevermind.. not that it really matters anyway.

 

Inspired by Andrew Rayel’s 550 (Senta Aether Mix)

Solemnization

This is how the solemnization for a Muslim-Malay marriage in Singapore goes

  1. Exchanging of marriage gifts (Hantaran) between representatives of the bride and groom before the solemnization, if any.
  2. A sermon (Khutbah) on marriage by the Kadi / Naib Kadi (solemnizer).
  3. The bride’s Wali appoints the Kadi / Naib Kadi to solemnize the marriage or otherwise agrees to solemnize the marriage himself.
  4. Solemnization (Akad’ Nikah).
  5. Taklik, reading of special marriage conditions by the groom.
  6. Prayers by the Kadi / Naib Kadi (Dua’).
  7. Groom giving the bride the Mahar (Maskahwin).
  8. Collection of the marriage certificate.

What items are needed

  1. NRICs of the groom, the bride and her Wali
  2. NRICs of the two witnesses
  3. Appointment Letter
  4. Mahar (Maskahwin)

 

What is a Hantaran (Marriage Expenses)?

A Hantaran is a customary gift, usually in cash, given by the groom to his bride’s family for the Walimah (wedding banquet).
The Hantaran rate must be agreed upon by both parties.

 

What is Wali?

In Islam, a Wali is a person who is responsible for the bride’s life before she is married.
As a Wali, it is also his duty to ensure that the proposed groom is a reliable and a trustworthy person who will continue to carry on his role and responsibility towards the bride after her marriage.

Who is a Wali?

Listed in the proper hierarchy, a Wali can be the bride’s birth father, her paternal grandfather, brother, paternal uncle or any male relative from her paternal side. If there is none available, then the Kadi will assume the role as a Wali.

What is the role of the Wali?

The Wali must consent to the marriage. The Wali must accompany the bride when she makes her registration at the Registry.

The role that a Wali plays in your marriage is of great importance. Hence, a Wali, who is found not to be lawful for the solemnization may render a marriage null and void. The consequence of an annulment is undesirable from both the Syariah and civil point of view. For one, the legality of the child that will be borne from the intended marriage that the couple is undergoing is dubious and this will have a bearing on future inheritance matters.

In any event the Wali’s consent is falsely declared, the Registry has the right to reject this marriage application and all bookings made in lieu to this application will be cancelled.

 

Akad Nikah

The groom must utter those words in one breath and must be clearly heard by at least two of the main witnesses sitting beside the kadi.
The kadi will then ask both witnesses and others whether the groom’s vows or recital can be accepted.
If they agree, then the marriage is solemnized and the wedded ones are now deemed husband and wife.

But then there are occasions when the Akad Nikah has to be taken again.
Why is that so?

Well, if the witnesses are not satisfied with the vows made by the groom, for example, his voice cannot be heard clearly, or he stutters or miss a word, or it is not done in one breath, so to speak, then the process of solemnization must be repeated.
Sometimes if the groom fails a few times, the imam will give him a break so that he could calm down and settle himself properly before the akad nikah is taken again.
This usually happens when the groom is really nervous and he forgets the words of acceptance, especially when there are many people around and he is not used to being the center of attention.
Sometimes too, the witnesses are just too fussy and not easily satisfied, and sometimes just want the vows to be taken again to test the seriousness of the groom on his marriage.
But, these cases where vows have to be taken many times are few and seldom.
Normally the vows are accepted after one recital by the groom or at the most, three times.

 

Signing of the documents

After the akad nikah is accepted and the kadi recites prayers for a happy and blissful marriage to the couple, he will then read to the groom the duties of a husband, his rights, the dos and don’ts, and also the duties and rights of the wife.

He will mention in particular the stages in pursuing the Islamic divorce and the consequences of reciting divorce intentions including incidences where it is lawful for the wife to seek divorce.

And after the kadi has finished with his advice ( mostly read from prepared text), the groom, acknowledging the advice given, will then sign the formal papers of marriage for official documentation purpose.

 

What is taklik?

In short, it is the conditions of divorce for the first few months of marriage, according to Islamic laws.
It is being recited after the official solemnization/akad nikah.

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Taklik (for those who want to know) which we got from the kadi at ROMM (Registry of Muslim Marriage).

In Malay:

Pada tiap-tiap kali, saya (sebutkan nama sendiri)

  • meninggalkan isteri saya, (sebutkan nama isteri) dengan sengaja atau tidak, selama 4 bulan atau lebih, atau
  • saya atau wakil saya tidak memberi nafkah kepadanya, selama masa tersebut, sedangkan is taat kepada saya, atau
  • saya melakukan sebarang perkara yang mencederakan tubuh badannya atau merosakkan hartabendanya atau menjatuhkan kehormatannya

kemudian mengadu ia kepada Mahkamah Syariah, serta didapati aduannya itu betul, nescaya gugurlah takak isteri itu dengan talak satu.

 

In English:

On every occasion that I (please mention your name)

  • leave my wife (mention her name) for a continuous period of 4 months or more, intentionally or unintentionally, or
  • fail to maintain her for the said period whereas she is obedient to me or
  • commit any action that causes injury to her body or damage to her property or causes her to lose self-respect

and my wife complains to the Syariah Court and if her complaint is proved, then she is divorced by one talak.

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What is a Maskahwin (Mahar)?

Mahar is a gift given by the groom to the bride after the solemnization ceremony.
It symbolises the beginning of a husband’s responsibility towards his wife in fulfilling her everyday needs.

Mahar can be in cash or benefits, such as gold, silver or money.
Mahar is the bride’s right and she owns the Mahar.
Thus, she has the will to dispose of it as she wishes.

The current minimum rate for the Mahar in Singapore is S$100 cash.

 

The last portion

The formalities of the akad nikah being over, the groom now will go to his wife and slip in the marriage ring.

This is essentially a symbol that he now can touch the bride being her lawful husband.
In Islam, males are not allowed to touch unrelated females, and vice versa, unless the skin or parts are covered.
Now, however, as husband and wife there are no such restrictions or prohibitions.

The ceremony ends with the bride kissing the groom’s hands after the placing of the ring.

They will later in the afternoon proceed for the “bersanding” ceremony – sitting “in state” on the pelamin (stage where they sit like a king/queen for a day)- the highlight of a traditional Malay wedding.

 

 

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